Didn't your momma tell you if it seems too good to be true, it probably IS too good to be true?

| 2/28/2002

The buzz around some truckstops is that there is a solution to getting those pesky tickets and it can be yours for $200. Is it a secret sign, a password, a force field around your truck?

An OOIDA member recently told Land Line he was approached by a fellow trucker while waiting at a shipper. During their chitchat, this stranger mentioned he had come across a sure fix for tickets and helpfully passed on a name of David-Wynn Miller and phone number.

A quick search on the Internet reveals loads of information on Miller, reportedly a controversial English teacher, linguist and legal scholar from Milwaukee. Miller claims to have 51,000 hours in the study of the law. He claims people of the United States are "Charter-Vessel-Citizens" and are thus, governed under maritime law. Under maritime law the smaller vessel always yields to the larger one and this could be an aid to truckers fighting a ticket. As crazy as it sounds, the controversial Miller has a number of followers who subscribe to his notions. Canadian newspapers call his doctrines "gibberish."

Miller claims, through studies of the current law, he has succeeded in rewriting the U.S. law codes by "mathematical claim for the educational correction of all the laws with the truthful-language of these United States of our world."

For a mere $225 (cost plus shipping), anyone can receive three CDs, two video tapes and one book with copy-ready pages to assist you in representing yourself in a court of law or when confronted by a police officer. So how do you keep the long arm of the law away from your truck? Miller tells truckers by putting an exact scaled-down replica of the U.S. flag and one $1 postage stamp on the back of your CDL plus your autograph, you become a "sort-of" postmaster, which exempts you from minor infractions of the law.

On the possibility you can't convince the DOT that you are above the law, Miller also has a heads-up on clever courtroom tactics. Supposedly, there is only one official U.S. flag which "preserves the rights protected by the U.S.A. Constitution. Under it you are innocent until proven guilty." However, if the flag displayed in the courtroom has yellow fringe on it, "it represents no nation and no constitution and you probably can't beat the charges." If national flags are displayed, they are government flags and "do not preserve the U.S.A. Constitutional rights and you are guilty until proven innocent under them." This, of course, according to Miller.

Heads up, truckers. The squirrels are not all in the trees...