Your health
Steering clear of the green-eyed monster

By Buck Black, LCSW, LCAC

Jealousy is common in all types of relationships. Long-distance relationships often give jealousy even more of a foothold, especially when you are on the road for weeks on end. There are several factors of being an over-the-road trucker that can breed jealousy. For example, not knowing where your partner is or what he or she is doing, having way too much time to think while you drive, and general miscommunication via text or phone can all hit that jealous bone.

Where is jealousy coming from? It is important to realize that a person becomes jealous when he or she thinks their partner will cheat.

Is there a history of your partner cheating? Are your partner’s actions out of line or is your thinking out of line? If you are worried your partner will cheat on you because someone else has cheated on you in the past, this worry is not fair to your current partner. Just because someone else has cheated on you in the past, it does not mean your current partner will cheat on you.

If your current partner has cheated on you in the past and you are worrying about future cheating, this is completely natural. Your partner’s actions of being faithful and being honest are the only way he or she can show changed behavior. If you become one of those people that feel you must check up on your partner or watch his/her every move, this can be very draining and does not lead to a healthy relationship.

If you have to watch their every move, why are you still with them?

I strongly urge people who feel jealous to identify what is causing this feeling. Once you have found a way to focus on the positives of the relationship and build trust, you and your partner will be much more relaxed and happier. Jealous feelings will decrease as you communicate with your partner in a healthy and productive way. However, there are instances when jealousy can become such an ingrained habit that it is extremely difficult to change these feelings. I urge a person in this situation to continue to work to break this habit and focus on more of the positives of life.

If the current partner has recently cheated, it is all about regaining trust. This will be a slow process that will require a great deal of patience and communication.

Buck Black is a licensed clinical social worker therapist who specializes in helping truckers and their families with anger and stress management, as well as depression and relationship problems. He does this over the phone, and Skype at TruckerTherapy.com. This column is the opinion of the writer and does not necessarily reflect the opinions of Land Line Magazine or its publisher. Please remember everyone's health situation is different. If you have questions regarding medical issues, consult your personal physician.